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G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Generally unfavorable reviews
Based on 25 critic reviews
How did we calculate this?
Based on 191 votes
Read user comments
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Movie Info
Genre(s): Action | Adventure | Sci-fi | Suspense/Thriller
Written by:
Stuart Beattie
David Elliot
Paul Lovett
Directed by: Stephen Sommers
Release Date:
Theatrical: August 7, 2009
Running Time: 107 minutes, Color
Origin: USA
Summary
RATING: PG-13 for adventure action and violence
Starring Channing Tatum, Sienna Miller, Marlon Wayans, Dennis Quaid, Christopher Eccleston, Ray Park, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and Christopher Eccleston
Paramount Pictures and Hasbro, whose previous collaboration was the worldwide blockbuster Transformers, join forces with Spyglass Entertainment for another extraordinary action-adventure "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra." From the Egyptian desert to deep below the polar ice caps, the elite G.I. JOE team uses the latest in next-generation spy and military equipment to fight the corrupt arms dealer Destro and the growing threat of the mysterious Cobra organization to prevent them from plunging the world into chaos. "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra." is directed by Stephen Sommers ("The Mummy," "The Mummy Returns").
Also On Metacritic
GAMES: G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (Xbox 360)
Also On The Web: Internet Movie Database Official Studio Site
What The Critics Said
All critic scores are converted to a 100-point scale. If a critic does not indicate a score, we assign a score based on the general impression given by the text of the review. Learn more...
The Onion (A.V. Club) Tasha Robinson
The Rise Of Cobra holds to a thrill-ride sensibility that’s unchallenging and more than a little goofy, but exciting and consistently well-managed.
Read Full Review >Variety Richard Kuipers
While thesping is not the main game here, having a cast of bright young things certainly helps, and Quaid gets in a few nice John Wayne-like moments as the no-nonsense boss.
Read Full Review >Washington Post Dan Kois
The loudest, flashiest, silliest and longest blockbuster in a summer full of long, silly, flashy, loud blockbusters (long and silly "Transformers," flashy and loud "Wolverine").
Read Full Review >Philadelphia Inquirer David Hiltbrand
A brazen, earsplitting, eye-popping, oddly satisfying action extravaganza, though it veers wildly off-target in its second hour.
Read Full Review >Boston Globe Ty Burr
A loud but proficient slab of explode-o-rama summer blockbuster nonsense, perfectly entertaining if you like that sort of thing, extremely skippable if you don't.
Read Full Review >Premiere John DeVore
This movie’s sole purpose is to make teenage boys high-five each other, and it’s faithfulness to that concept makes the cartoon carnage almost endearing.
Read Full Review >Los Angeles Times Betsy Sharkey
The action is mostly brisk and bracing and the battleground, particularly Cobra's headquarters -- a vast network of tunnels under the polar ice cap -- are wonderfully imagined, as are the futuristic machines at the Joes' disposal. Basically, the Joes are not bad, it's just that they could have been much better with a little less conversation, a little more action.
Read Full Review >San Francisco Chronicle Peter Hartlaub
It's hard to deny that the first two-thirds of G.I. Joe is an enjoyable film, especially when graded on the curve of lowered expectations. Compared to other big-budget movies out this summer, it's pretty mediocre.
Read Full Review >ReelViews James Berardinelli
Chock full of high-tech action, with a lot of chasing and shooting and explosions.
Read Full Review >The Globe and Mail (Toronto) Stephen Cole
The plot feels both familiar and far-fetched.
Read Full Review >New Orleans Times-Picayune Mike Scott
Unlike it's "Transformers" cousin, the story is appealingly straightforward, and the movie is chock-a-block with breathless action sequences.
Read Full Review >Chicago Tribune Michael Phillips
G.I. Joe may not be beefier, but it’s cheesier and less aggravating than "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen," the summer ’09 headbanger it most resembles.
Read Full Review >Empire Dan Jolin
Bond without the style and Team America without the bellylaughs. The moronic script and nonsensical plot are good for a snicker, though.
Read Full Review >Chicago Sun-Times Roger Ebert
Certainly better than "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen." How so? Admittedly, it doesn't have as much cleavage. But the high-tech hardware is more fun to look at than the transforming robots, the plot is as preposterous, and although the noise is just as loud, it's more the deep bass rumbles of explosions than the ear-piercing bang of steel robots pounding on each other.
Read Full Review >LA Weekly Chuck Wilson
After a first hour that plays like a bad TV show, Sommers hits his groove with an over-the-top Paris chase sequence that, in turn, leads to an underwater finale that’s absurdly overproduced, momentarily diverting, and then instantly forgettable.
Read Full Review >Chicago Reader Cliff Doerksen
Loud, shiny, and critic-proof, this franchise launcher is basically Transformers minus the humanity. Dennis Quaid provides some ballast as grizzled patriarch to the troop of sexy young lock-and-loaders.
Read Full Review >The Hollywood Reporter Frank Scheck
After nearly two hours of nonstop mayhem, the film ends on a surprisingly muted note, though pains have been taken to make sure that the hoped-for sequel has been carefully set up.
Read Full Review >Time Richard Corliss
The only collateral damage is in the audience, where, as you sit through the movie, you can feel your IQ drop minute by minute.
Read Full Review >Entertainment Weekly Chris Nashawaty
Don't go expecting an escapist night at the movies; go expecting to be cudgeled into numb, drooling submission.
Read Full Review >Austin Chronicle Marjorie Baumgarten
G.I. Joe was not screened for critics, but that’s not because of its mindless action and nonsensical plot. It’s because G.I. Joe is the kind of movie that bludgeons the viewer into submission with its loud and constant barrage of sound and fury.
Read Full Review >New York Post Kyle Smith
Formerly a real American hero, G.I. Joe is no longer a hero (it's a group) or American. (It's a multinational team of military superstars, though the way it does business, you'd feel safer with the Croatian navy on your side.)
Read Full Review >Rolling Stone Peter Travers
I don't know what to say about the acting, writing and directing in G.I. Joe because I couldn't find any.
Read Full Review >New York Daily News Joe Neumaier
There's a way to do this kind of thing (Just witness Hasbro's other toy-turned-dumb movie franchise, "Transformers"). G.I. Joe, though, hasn't got a kung fu-grip on what it is.
Read Full Review >The New York Times Manohla Dargis
This pricey, juiceless pulp could never have been killed by critics, simply because it was already dead.
Read Full Review >What Our Users Said
The average user rating for this movie is 5.4 (out of 10) based on 191 User Votes
Note: User votes are NOT included in the Metascore calculation.
Adam K gave it a1:
This movie is absolutely awful. I grew up watching Transformers, GI Joe, and other shows along the same basis. In saying that, I have seen all of the above movies. This movie had incredibly terrible special effects, acting, writing, and directing. There is nothing good to say about this movie. I am glad I did not spend the money to see this in the theater and only wish I could say I did not spend the money to rent it.
Francis A gave it a7:
I gave this movie a 7 because I was a huge fan of GI JOE as a kid. If I was the average person who doesn't have any knowledge of GI JOE from the 80's. I would probably give it a 2.5-3 just because the film is looks like a close replica of how Transformers was shot. Army, secret government task force, action scenes through the city, cheesy relationships, I can go on and on. I read Ebert's review and he was thinking that the Ninjas were in it because they need the asian audience in Japan. Which of course if you are a true JOE fan you would know Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow are a major part of GI Joe/Cobra. When I watched this movie, I watched it like I was that 10 year old boy again. GI Joe was made for 30 year olds who love the nostalgia of their childhood. If this was the worst movie you have ever seen I don't blame you. I really hated Revenge of the Fallen.
Tim H gave it a2:
Wow... that... was... dumb... I fought the urge to turn it off in the first 5 friggin' minutes - I should at least get a t-shirt for my trouble, but alas, no free t-shirt came with my $1 rental at the RedBox - that's highway robbery if you ask me. If I had gone to see it in the theater, I would have walked out and asked for my money back, just like that piece of trash, "Silent Hill." Trust me, giving it a "2" is generous; it makes the movie "Steath" look like "Full Metal Jacket" - know what I'm saying.
Eddie L gave it a1:
Woeful plot. Unless you are a ten year old boy. You will like it.The script will bore you to tears!!
Kenny gave it a1:
Stephen Sommers once again bring a firecracker, an animal without bones or thorns but very airheaded. A pretentious product, which only helps the less demanding audience can 'flip' with great special effects and the toys of Ghostbusters. Dialogue taken from a script stupid stupid and without foundation, filled with silly jokes and scenes as phantoms. No doubt the movie Sommers filling complies with all the topics of most Hollywood movies, has not been forgotten either. Marlon Wayans could have stayed at home smoking marijuana. Sienna Miller o 'the girl', her character is the big topic of the film. And last the little character named Channing Tatum, "to say about this 'intimate' 'macho'?, Better to say nothing, really, better abstain. No where to get it.
Zachrid W. gave it a5:
It's a "no brainer", that is for sure. I don't know much about the G.I. Joe franchise, but if you are able to turn off your brain for a while - you will enjoy this movie. I wanted to see a stupid story, corny dialogue, superweapons, over-the-top action with CGI up the butt ... and well, that was basically what I got. Good movie to munch popcorn and "MST3000ing" but not worth more than 5 points.
maw gave it a6:
It's good enough for a 6 with my lowered expectations. I didn't expect an Oscar-winner like some people here did. I expected it to be extremely cheesy and campy and sure enough it was. And if you suspend logic and ignore bad acting for a little while, you're going to enjoy this movie. As a long time G.I. Joe fan myself, this movie is good enough.
